Tuesday, 10 March 2009

Is it too much to ask?

My needs are simple and clear, and as such, I think should be easy to meet. I don't require world peace, although it would be nice. I don't require a good cell phone plan - God knows I wouldn't know how to act with the extra money they rip off from me. I don't even require good petite jeans anymore - yes, at the age of 35 I am used to looking like shite or homeless when I relax. I don't require a man...but I do admit it's nice when a good one is around.

What *are* my needs (you ask)?
Simple.
Shoes that are comfy with a heel - so I can at least feel sexier than my 5 feet allow.
Moisturizing conditioner that *actually* freakin WORKS. I don't care about the cost
Tortilla chips that hold dip... and my dip I mean the full spread of guac, salsa, sour cream and peppers.
I require store made guac to be at least decent - I am LAZY and WHY can't I find good ready made guacamole?
I require my broadband to connect at least *near* the speed I pay for.
I require people to understand that just because I don't give a shit, doesn't mean I don't care.

See? This is just a simple sample of my simple needs...
So why, WHY, must life be such a struggle? I don't even really mind when I'm broke... but I give a MAJOR shit about having a comfortable bra that gives me awesome boobs - I don't want to hurt. Bra that hurts is not sexy.

Can someone please direct the requirement fairy to my house?

Love,
Lynn - who would KILL for there to be ONE Mexican restaurant in the UK - ONE! I would travel, and I would be grateful.

1 comment:

Kim said...

Absolutely beautiful dear cousin. Your words speak the truth!