Ach. Well, I guess just when one is sure one knows a thing, your own true nature slaps you back in to focus.
I swore over and over again I was fine. I stood tall, and I took the rain. Matter of fact, not a lot can be seen different in me between then and now. But I am. I went down hard, and stayed down, it seems. I’ve ignored all, and crawled in to me…
And now? I looked out of my cave today. I saw the sun for the few short minutes it shared itself in the UK. I loved every second of it. Until today, I only shared me with the Moon…because it’s dark, and safe, and something you can do alone. When you are busy dancing as fast as you can, the Moon is your surest friend.
But today? I saw more, and I wanted more, and I became. I never realised I had tucked in to me until I woke up.
For my friends and family who some how knew it and gave me the space to deal, and the quiet acceptance to heal… I love you for it. I never saw the protective bubble I was in until I decided to leave it for a few minutes. It’s bloody brilliant out there folks.
And so I say leave, and let me go. I’ve loved and lost, and now it seems I am ready to play again. I’ll be tying up my shoes and joinin’ y’all in the playground a little more often.
You know… The Portuguese word “tanto” is a forever kind of word. There is nothing bigger than tanto…and for me, it covers a multitude of things. I’ll be dancing and laughing. See you all there.
<bowing low to the quiet support I never even realised I had.>
Lynn – smiling now, a real smile… from the soap-box.
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